This is My blog!

19.5.14

Greetings, I am Unice Corn, actress, writer, mystical beast and Star Wars fan!

Fifteen years ago I posted some photos of my delightful trip home to California to line up for The Phantom Menace! I am showing them to you again because I have many good memories even though Yoda was not at the premiere! Here are my photos, I hope you enjoy them!

Just as I did in 1983, I bid farewell to the sorry saps in my neighborhood and headed west, to the Chinese Theater!

When I was here for Return of the Jedi I stuck my horn and my paws in some cement! I must see if they preserved it!

At first I camped out in the room of Lincoln Gasking from countingdown.com, but he showed up and told me where I had to go!

I got a great parking spot for my throne right across from the hotel!

I helped prepare the food for all of us brave souls! I made sure we got plenty of garlic!

Here I am with the gang, letting everyone know where it's at!

I spent a lot of time chatting with the gang, many people were surprised to see a Unicorn on the streets of Los Angeles! I told them I was surprised to see them too! That took care of that.

Some people came to heckle us, but they can't shake our faith! The Force is with us! This is not the line you're looking for! HEEHEEHEE

Oh the fun we had! I introduced the gang to garlic bleils! I started a conga line to the Cantina song! His name was Yoda... He was a Muppet...

The weather got pretty nasty! I found that my throne was not weatherproof.

I watched the trailers 5000 times in one day! Later the gang told me to go back to the hotel to sleep so they could get some work done. I'm sure they missed me very much!

Some final thoughts before seeing the film:

I cannot wait to get into the theater to see the movie!

I think that Darth Maul is a wonderful role model for horned beings everywhere! I want to be just like him except I do not want to beat up on nice Jedis and I do not want to tattoo my face all funny colors.

I think Yoda is pretty hot too! I hope there are some steamy scenes with him and Yaddle! I think they would make an adorable couple!

I am wondering if maybe the Queen would like another handmaiden.

Perhaps I can travel back to Australia with Lincoln and be an extra in Episode II!

Find out what I'm talking about - Yoda, baby!

I have new thoughts!

In the many years since Yoda's first adventure, I have searched the world to find a fan who loves Yoda as much as me and I cannot find one! They try to tell me his movies are stupid but after I tell them about Yoda they see they are wrong! Yoda is a bad ass! They tell me about the Vader man being made of wood and the crazy lizard man but I do not care! Yoda has not made any more movies because he has made the best ones!

I cannot wait for the Yoda movie! I am very glad Mr. Lucas sold his ideas to Mickey! I want Yoda to sing and dance with penguins! I cannot wait!

Much love to you!

Unice! ~ 19.5.14 ~ (0) comments

21.1.14

The answer to "Stumped in Stockholm": 54 down is "BustaRhymes".

More letters are coming soon when you write to me!

Unice! ~ 21.1.14 ~ (0) comments

31.10.13

Dear Unice:
I heard you make a wild Garlic Cake. Would you please give me the recipe? I want to make one for my husband.

Dracula's Bride

Dear Mrs. Drac:
The recipe for my Garlic Cake has been in my family for centuries, first created by my great-great-great-great-great-great-great- great-great-great-great-great grammy Uniquette in the highlands of Nebraska!

You can make all the ingredients from scratch, or buy them from the stop 'n go if you're in a hurry!

You seem to be in a hurry, so I'll just use brandnames!

You'll need lots of garlic, M&M's, whole walnuts - still in the shell, frosting, peanut butter, three entire candy bars, some soy sauce, cheese curls, and some bread!

Mix the above together and serve. Make sure you don't take the walnuts out of their shells. You can top with ice cream or cornflakes. Finish off by covering in sprinkles!

Serve this with a good steak!

Unice!

Unice! ~ 31.10.13 ~ (0) comments

24.10.13

Oh mystical Unice:
I am a garden worshipper. My garden has been very sad lately, what can I do?

Ceres in Cincinatti

Dear Grain Girl:
Whip the trees and get the roses drunk! If that doesn't work, wait until Spring!

My birthday is in Spring, you know!

Unice!

Unice! ~ 24.10.13 ~ (0) comments

20.8.13

Dear Uni: My boyfriend gets very upset when I call him by his childhood nickname in public. I think he's just being really immature and I tell him so.
His parents used to call him "Stinkyhead" because he used to grab his little brother's old diapers and put them on his head.

Stinky's girl

Dear Stinkbomb:
Did I say it was all right for you to call me Uni? No, I do not think I did. Only people I know can call me Uni. I am Unice! I was given a name with five letters to make up for my lack of toes! So don't you call me "Uni", you... Stink woman!

What were his brother's diapers doing lying around anyway? That is sick! Never mind the nickname, he needs help!

Ms. Corn.

Unice! ~ 20.8.13 ~ (0) comments